G20 relieved no longer has to pretend to care about poor

G20 representatives expressed universal relief today in Seoul, Korea that they no longer have to pretend to feel deep concern about global poverty. “Thank goodness for all the grave problems the rich countries face,” said one anonymous and technically fictitious official. “Now we can stick to things we actually care about.” Another gave a representative view: “it’s been exhausting every year since Gleneagles in 2005, going through hours of discussion to come up with enough meaningless actions to show our deep empathy for the global poor.”

“Our statements always stressed the sufferings of those people,” he continued, “but we were suffering too, working far into the night and often missing gala dinners to negotiate the details of the promises that we never intended to keep.”

The New York Times also reports on this story using non-fictional sources.